Conversation In My Head: WTH

Brain: Whach ya doin’?

Me: Sleeping

Brain: Oh!…sorry…sorry. I didn’t know you were sleeping.

Me: It’s ok just let me go back to sleep.

Brain: Ok, ok

Me: …

Brain: …

Brain: …

Brain: …

Brain: Remember that time…

Me: don’t start with that shit!

Brain: What?!

Me: You know exactly what I am talking about. You make me remember a time I embarrassed my self, did something slightly wrong, or something REALLY wrong and you harp on it! Even worse is when you talk about all the things bad that have ever happened to me or that I have ever done. NO! I am NOT dealing with this again! Shut the hell up! leave me alone! I have been overworked annnnnddd! Thanks to this new diet and exercise my stomach won’t shut up either! with all that said…PLEASE for the all that is HOLY! BEEEEEEE QUIET!  

Stomach: I’M HUNGRY!!!

Me: Oh! Now, look what you did!

Brain: What the hell did I do?!

Blatter: NO MORE LIQUIDS I’M FULL!!

Me: OH! FOR FUUUU…

Me: *Gets up and goes to the bathroom.*

Blatter: 🙂

Me: *walks back to bed a bit frustrated* 

Colon: Oh…is it daytime, good I really gotta go!

Me: *As I am climbing into bed*…Oh no…..*runs back to bathroom* 

 

 

One shower later

 

Me: *sigh* *crawling into bed & closes eyes*

Phone: BEEP BEEP BEEP

Me: *starts crying internally* 

 

C.S.

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